Why Do Men Cheat?
Infidelity is painful for millions of women. The idea of seeing your man with another woman causes you a great deal of pain. Why do men cheat? Is it something that you did or is it because he simply wants some booty?
A man usually cheats because he cannot control his lustful desires. It is hard for a man to be around a woman that he finds to be attractive and not cheat.
Yes, men know that if they do cheat on you, the relationship will be over. However, when a man crosses the line, it usually means that he was looking for some booty and not another woman.
Men that want to leave you for another woman often do it because they feel that you are driving them up the wall. Men usually give warning signs if they are cheating for an emotional reason.
What Is The Meaning of Infidelity?
If a man is thinking about moving on from you because he feels that you are not giving him what he needs, he will often tell you. He may drop hints. If you see yourself fighting with him a lot and he is calling you the Bit** word, your relationship is in big trouble.
Men usually resort to name calling when he doesn’t think that you are listening to him. If he feels that you are dominating or trying to control him, he will often resort to name calling.
If things have been going great in your love life and you find that he was unfaithful to you, its most likely because he had trouble controlling his lustful desires. He didn’t think that you were going to catch him.
If he starts apologizing and saying that he is sorry, he wants forgiveness for his lustful ways. This is a time when you need to dig deep into your heart and ask yourself if you can forgive him. If its clear that your man wants you back, you need to decide if you can truly forgive him.
Only around 30% of women forgive an affair within a relationship. If a woman takes a man back that has cheated on her, she often can’t forget what he did. Every time that they have an argument, she will want to bring up the affair.
If this happens, the relationship cannot survive. The man will continue to feel like he is never forgiven. He will feel your bitterness and pain. Eventually, he will want to end the relationship.
Most women try to blame themselves for infidelity. There are times when you should blame yourself and other times when you can’t blame yourself at all.
For instance, if your infidelity is caused by him feeling that you are nagging him or controlling him, its something that you will have to work on. However, if he has cheated on you because he saw a beautiful face that he couldn’t resist, then you cannot blame yourself.
It’s important that you don’t start thinking that breast implants or liposuction will help you be the only woman that he will ever desire. No matter what your man may tell you, all men will desire another woman from time to time. A faithful man will not cheat on you.
Most of the time, men turn away from affairs. They don’t want to cheat on you because they don’t want to lose you. The risk is higher than the reward of having a one-night stand with another woman.
It is true that even when men and women are together, they have attraction towards another person. There is nothing wrong with that because it comes naturally. We cannot help whom we are attracted to. However, with discipline, you can overcome the lustful temptations that often come your way.
Why Women Cheat?
Most women cheat on their partner because their emotional needs are not being met. They often find the need to feel desired by another man. Women often feel that their worth is in their beauty. If a man is not showing or giving her attention, she tends to look outside of the relationship for it.
Infidelity often happens in the relationship when the woman feels like her man is working to much and not home enough to see her. She often feels like her relationship is not what she expected. She often feels like her man is not wanting to be with her.
Perhaps he is spending to much time out of the house with his friends/family. She may see him wanting to hang out with other people than her. It can be devastating for a woman to not feel desired by her partner.
Women can cheat for booty only. However, this is not typically why a woman cheat. Usually a woman will be faithful to her partner and feel like he is “doing it for her”. If she doesn’t get what she wants, she often finds someone else to give her what she needs.
Women often don’t find one night stands appealing because they feel that it doesn’t lead to anything. Usually she needs more in the bedroom than a one-night stand can give her. Often, she desires to have a man with her that she trusts and knows desires her.
If a woman does cheat for booty alone, its often because she is not with the person that she really wants to be with. This often happens when a woman is forced into marrying a man that she is not interested in. Sometimes families will put pressure on the woman to marry because they don’t want to see her living alone when she is older.
Certain cultures choose the husband for the woman and she doesn’t feel any lustful desire for him. Intimacy to her is something that is boring because she feels no romantic chemistry with her. Just like a man, a woman cannot help whom she is attracted to.
How to Catch a Cheater
If you suspect infidelity in your relationship, here are a few steps to take in order to catch a cheater. For starters, don’t let him/her have devices that you have no access to.
If he/she can’t give you the password to his phone, social media accounts and email, you have a problem on your hands. The reason for this is that no sneakiness should exist between partners. If he/she is acting nervous about giving you his password, he/she is most likely doing something behind your back.
Monitor your partners work hours. Check to see if they are really scheduled to work certain days and to have off certain days. You will find that people tend to cheat when they think that they can tell you that they are working and, they are hanging out at another lover’s home.
Check his/her credit card statements. You will often find that cheaters will charge a dinner for two on a credit card and it will make you wonder who he was out with.
Ask him/her questions about who he was spending time with. Ask a lot of questions to see if he/she was with a person from the opposite sex. Was it a friend or a co-worker? Was it a stranger? Why did they feel the need to pay for the meal? Usually cheaters will try to impress the person that they are out with. Paying for a meal often shows that you are interested in that man or woman.
Do All Men Cheat?
All men do not cheat. It is the same thing as saying that all people are not going to be overweight or underweight. The reasons for cheating are many as described above. Men that have high morals because of religion tend to cheat less. It’s because they feel subject to God.
They know that if they cheat and their religions teaches that infidelity is sinful, then they are often more cautious to cheat. Some men find that even looking at another woman lustfully is wrong. Men that live for themselves often cheat because they feel no moral obligation to anyone.
They often feel like they are getting something that they want for that moment or time period. A man that cheats is often someone that has gotten away with it before or feels that you won’t find out about it.
You should check your relationship to see why your man would think that. Are you doing something that would make him think that he could “pull one over your eyes”?
We can say that at least 50% of marriages make it these days. These marriages are often found to be pure and with little to no physical intimacy happening with someone outside of the marriage. Most people that get married see marriage as a lifelong commitment. They got married because they see marriage as a lifelong commitment and don’t want to have cheating taking place within the relationship.
After the Affair?
After the affair is over with, forgiveness must take place. If there is any hope to get the romance back in order one must forgive and forget. The cheater must show signs that they will never cheat again. If they can’t do that, the relationship will not make it beyond a few years.
After the affair, the couple should get counseling to see what wrong. If it was simply because one of you wanted booty only, then this activity must cease. You need to find a group that can be supportive of people that cheat for pure bedroom pleasure.
It’s important to not be with someone that has no self-control. If your partner has no self-control, it’s time to pause the relationship and have a partial separation until they have shown they they can control themselves from chasing booty. This goes for both the man and the woman. If the cheating was emotional, a counselor will have to work with the both of you to fix the problem.
Caution should always be taken after the affair because it can happen again if issues are not dealt with. You must bring to the table what is happening between the two of you. You need to both see your wrong doings and where needs are not being met. Often, couples cannot do this on their own and counseling can help you to build a new foundation.
Don’t let family and friends influence your decision. Stick to the person that you want to be with. No matter what, everyone will always have an opinion of your love life. You must take full control and realize that you need to have something good to say in it.
Don’t let others boss you around and control you. Don’t gossip about your partner to those that are closest to you. It will only make them grow to hate your partner. If you want to talk behind your partners back, talk to a counselor, pastor or therapist. Don’t start putting out on social media about how you feel your partner in life has screwed you over. This kind of action only destroys relationships and builds mistrust.
An Unfaithful Partner Must Be Kicked to the Curb
After you have forgiven your partner for infidelity, it should never happen again. If they are unfaithful and do it again, cut them out of your life. They don’t respect you or care enough to have you in their life forever.
You both have no reason to want one another. Remember, infidelity has caused you a great deal of pain. Your spirit can only handle so much. You will never be able to trust that person if it happens more than once.
You will always be wondering if they are out doing the same thing as they did last time. You will feel that you are not good enough for them and feel like you always must be watching over your shoulder.
This is something that clearly won’t work. Just because your relationship doesn’t work now, doesn’t mean that it won’t work ten years from now. Often, cheaters go away from their partners lives and cheat on other people.
After a few years, they start to think back on whom they hurt and may be missing you for being the best thing that ever happened to them. Sometimes, a cheater can learn the hard way and later down the road, you may want to give them another try.
However, in the meantime, they have lost respect for you and only care about their own needs. This person lacks discipline to be in a relationship and doesn’t deserve you.
Learn to accept that the relationship didn’t work for you and now most move on to something bigger and better. It is something that is painful to understand for the most part.
Why is Adultery So Painful?
Adultery is painful because we want to believe that our life partner wants us and only us. When we see that this is not the case, our pain goes higher and we begin to see that we are not as desired as we thought we were.
We don’t want to think of ourselves as being less desirable. We want to think of ourselves as being the best thing that has ever happened to the person that we feel called to be with.
We all know that adultery is wrong, and we often blame ourselves for not giving the relationship what it really needed. Sometimes an adulterous person will walk through life wondering why they are doing wrong. Adultery touches the heart of our being and we often don’t know if our relationship can be saved because of it.
Adultery is nothing new. It has been around for thousands of years. However, how we handle adultery is different for every person and culture.
If you believe that your relationship can be saved, I highly encourage you to save it. Sometimes we think that the grass may be greener on the other side if we simply bond with another person that may not cheat on us.
However, having a new partner means that there will be a new set of problems. Sometimes a new partner can have a drug problem and your old partner was only a cheater.
Perhaps the new person that you are going to date is a cheater as well and you don’t know it. There can be many different reasons as to why someone is going to cheat on you or be faithful.
Try to use your own intuition when it comes to figuring out love and bonding. Try to fix a relationship that you are currently in because the grass is almost never greener on the other side.
In fact, most people find that when they are bonding with someone new, they have a whole set of problems that they are trying to deal with. New relationships will always have their new challenges. They are often problematic for us because we often don’t know what the future will hold in them.