Are You Alone?
As Christians, we understand being alone as being something scary. It may make us feel isolated and like nobody cares about us. Even our savior Jesus Christ felt alone when he said to God, “Why have you forsaken me” (Matthew 27:46).
When we become a born-again Christian, we often lose friends, family and those that can’t understand our newfound life. It is hard to be alone because human beings are meant to interact with one another. However, sometimes, family and friends will desert us.
We may find that someone in our family or friends is not supposed to be a part of our lives anymore because they live in sin and we should not hang around sinners or else we can become like them.
The Good Things About Being Alone:
- You can spend more time with Jesus by reading the Holy Bible and praying.
- You can have a Bible study at your home.
- You can reflect on your life and start writing a book, blog or journal.
- You can understand that you have nobody else telling you what to do.
- You can discover what else life has to offer you by reading books.
When we are alone, we often understand life a lot better. We have more mental clarity because we can reflect on our lives a lot more. We can see what led us to being alone and if its for the better.
Why Being Alone Isn’t That Bad
I find that being alone allows us to go on a religious retreat.
I spend most of my life alone. I was always friendly and said hello to people. However, friendships seemed to come and go in my life for one reason or another. I can say that spending time along in my 20’s allowed me to understand people a lot better. It allowed me to see what different personalities all were about.
When I was in my early 20’s, I would often meet up with some acquaintances at the bible school that I attended. It was a good time for the most part. I tried to bond with some of the students in my school, but that is often easier said than done.
Bible school students often want to put on a “holier than though” facade because they are afraid of letting people know the real them. I found that most of my Bible school acquaintances wanted to show that they were worthy to be a pastor. They dint’ want to get close to anyone or let their guard down and get close.
The best types of friends are those that will let you know them for who they are. They will allow you to see that they let their guard down and let you see the real them.
I believe that most people feel alone today because we live in a world where most people are afraid to show you who they really are. They are afraid of you seeing their flaws and things about themselves that make them unique.
I think that having a friend in the Lord is a blessing from God. I say this because most people don’t have this. I would rather have one good friend than a million bad ones.
I have found that when a person takes time to invest in you, they are a genuine and loving soul for your life.
I have found that finding love with your spouse is the best friend that you could possible have. After all, what God has joined, let no man separate.
When you have found our lifelong companion, you begin to feel like the world is on your side. You begin to see that God has opened a door for you to have someone in your life that will always be there.
Accept the fact that sometimes, God will allow only one person to be in your life. Sometimes we are not meant to have many friends because it can corrupt us.
God wants what is best for us. If you have a spouse, ask them where they see your lives right now. Are you both lonely?
In many relationships, both the man and the woman often feel alone. There is nothing wrong with this. When a young couple gets married, they often have dreams and fantasies of starting their own family.
They have dreams of their children being they’re for them when they are old. However, as the couples grows older, they come to realize that their children eventually leave them and don’t see them every day.
There is nothing worse then coming to the realization that being alone will eventually happen to all of us. The older we get, the more friends and family we lose.
I recently visited a senior citizen community and found a lot of senior citizens alone. They were in their own spaces through the senior living community. I saw loneliness in their face. Amazingly, they all had families and children. However, they felt alone because nobody saw them on a regular basis.
In order to defeat loneliness, its best to find one person that you can spend your life with. Visitors are nice and so are children. However, you must never cling to family and friends if they will one day desert you.
Its always fund to have family and friends around you. However, its often only temporary and around holidays. The rest of the time, you are alone, and you feel like your life is moving in a different direction.
Life is a journey that each of us must travel in. We all have times in which we would rather have someone there with us and at other times, we feel like we would rather be pushing someone else away that is not truly there for our needs.
I have found that most people feel alone because they have nobody to know the real them. Therefore, you can be in a room full of people talking. Everyone is talking, but nobody feels bonded to anyone. It’s a great feeling to have someone in your life that will always love you.
When you have love, you have everything that you need. Love is powerful and is described in 1 Corinthians 13. When you read about love in the Bible, it says that we are to love.
I remember feeling lonely as a child as well. I can remember in my sixth-grade class, everyone seemed to have friends but me. I always felt like I was the outsider. I later learned as I got older that a lot of people feel this way and often don’t talk about it.
The internet is full of lonely people describing their despair of not feeing like they fit in or that anybody really cares for them. I am the kind of person that lends my hand in friendship to everyone that crosses my path.
I am happy to say that I have had a few friends over the years that would stick around for awhile and then vanish from my life. I later learned that this happens to a lot of people.
Ghosting has become popular today. Most people feel that its easier to just ghost someone than to sit down and have an actual conversation as to why you don’t think that your connection with them is working. Ghosting today has become popular and is often hurtful for many people.
The Bible does tell us that its not good for the man to be alone (Genesis 2:18). If you remember, God created Adam and then Eve to be his wife. The two were the perfect couple and connection.
If you are not with anyone romantically, you need to ask God to send you a romantic partner and give you someone that will always love you. When we do this, God hears our prayers and begins to work a miracle by bringing someone into our life to love romantically.
It’s important to see that life is not always what we want. If God sends you someone that you don’t think is for you, try to dig deeper into that person and ask yourself what the relationship could possibly mean. Whey would God send you someone that you may not physically be attracted to. Perhaps the Lord is trying to teach you something.
Many young people today often feel alone. They feel that their romantic relationships come and go. They may even feel that they try to get someone to love them and yet nobody seems all that interested.
I have seen more breakups happening with this generation than in my own. I grew up in the 80’s and it was a time when everything was a lot different than it is now. Today, most people seem to be dating and dumping. I have noticed that with the millennial generation, that if you make a mistake in the relationship, its probably going to be over with.
I have found that couples will date if there are no problems. As soon as a problem arises, most of the millennials want to bail out on the relationship and find someone new to be with.
The “grass is not greener on the other side”. I think that this is a life lesson that most millennials will soon see.
Nothing is perfect in life. When you begin to see that being alone is often because we are not meant to be with certain people, it sorts of makes sense why we are alone.
If you use your time wisely and to your advantage, being alone may not be as bad as you might think. I think that in time, you will be able to find activities that you can do on your own.
How Do I Make Friends If I Don’t Want to Be Alone?
Making friends at any age can be a challenge. You will find that you often feel that you don’t fit in or that the people around you may not like you for one reason for another. It’s important to embrace that and realize that you may not be in the right place. Ask Jesus to bring you to a place in which you can meet someone that you get along with and see eye to eye with as well.
If you want to make friends, put yourself in Christian circles that meet up regularly. As brothers and sisters in Christ, we are called to bond with other Christians. If someone is a true Christian, they will see a benefit in befriending you.
I find that living in a digital age prevents us from bonding with other people. Therefore, it’s important to always bond with someone that is in person. You will find that sitting down and playing a game with someone is a lot of fun. If you are socially awkward, do some volunteer work and you will find that you often make friends with the people that you are around. You will often find that helping someone will allow you to feel a sense of happiness as well.
I find that when I am outgoing, people see that they can become my friend. I like to think of myself as being someone that will always be able to find someone that I can socialize with.
What’s Stopping You from Finding Friends?
Often, we may feel that we are not good enough to have a friend. Perhaps we have done something in our life that we regret. We may think that we are the worst kind of person.
However, as Christians, we should know that Jesus has forgiven us. It’s important to find other Christian believers that want to bond together with you in order to build friendship. Yes, everyone that you connect with will often feel alone. They may not say it to you, but we all feel like loneliness is inside of our hearts from time to time.
The worst thing that you can do when you feel alone is to isolate yourself. Nobody can become your friend if you lock yourself away. It’s only when we branch out and find people that we can socialize with does everything in our lives become more powerful.
Look Up Old Friends
Sometimes, you will find that your old friends are looking for you as well. Facebook is a wonderful tool for connecting with friends that were once in our lives and then separated from us.
Sometimes, we can have a friend that has been looking for us and we have no idea what may have happened to us. However, we manage to find one another and then suddenly, the friendship is rekindled. Praise God when something good happens for us.
In time, we can see life as changing and coming to a point in which we feel a sense of happiness and power in our lives. I think that the Lord will often open doors and lead us to the people that we are meant to be involved with.
I can only imagine what the apostles must have felt like after being separated from Jesus and one another after the crucifixion. The apostles were told to preach the gospel to the world.
This means that they had to go and separate themselves from one another. The loss of this friendship must have been difficult. However, they managed to take Jesus with them and the Holy Spirit. It is always a blessing to see Jesus showing us that the world can be a different place because he is the center of our lives.
Hopefully, you now have a good understanding of why being alone is not as bad as it may seem. I hope that you have gotten some tips on how to find friends and not be alone if you are lonely.