Love is generally the best thing we do. Relationships are one of the best human experience that we can have for ourselves, and nothing can come close to such a unique feeling.
No matter how much relationships can frustrate us and hurt us in the long run, relationships are unlike anything else. If you have a boyfriend, it’s an extraordinary to have a shared love and affection in the relationship. With this being said, the following is how you can get love and affection from your boyfriend:
Should You Spend Time With Them?
Of course, how do you expect to get love and affection if you don’t spend time with them? Intimacy isn’t formed by the knowledge you have of them, but by giving them your time.
Time is the most valuable thing you can give someone and when you give someone your time, you’re saying that they’re worth spending time with. The people you give you your time and those you end up giving love and affection to, since these are the people you feel closest to.
When you constantly spend time with your boyfriend, whether that’s going on dates or coming over to their place for a move night, they’re bound to give you love and affection.
How To Know Their Love Language
Everyone has different love languages, and you may think your boyfriend feels loved with a certain love language, but it doesn’t work for them. For all you know, their love language may be words of affirmation and quality time, but you keep spoiling them with material gifts.
In order to get love and affection from your boyfriend, know their love language. By loving them in their love language, the more they’ll be able to reciprocate that love back. If people don’t feel loved in the right way, they have no motive to show love either.
After all, nobody wants a one-sided kind of love. If you want his attention and love, knowing his love language is the key. Observe which love language makes him feel appreciated the most, and stick to that.
Should You Spend Time Apart?
This might seem unusual to you since how do you get the attention and love from your boyfriend if you’re apart- when we literally just implied to spend time with them? It’s been proven that distance does make the heart grow fonder, and you need to give them the chance to miss you.
How can they miss you when you’re constantly around them? By spending time apart, it gives your boyfriend time to miss you and think about you, and that’s when he’ll chase you with the love and affection you’re looking for.
Distance isn’t always a bad thing, especially in healthy relationships. After all, he can’t give you love and affection when you’re always smothering him with affection, right? You need to give them the opportunity to chase you, and distance is the perfect way to do that.
Should You Anticipate Their Needs?
Everyone has different needs, especially emotional ones in a relationship. If you want to gain love and affection from your boyfriend, know his needs and provide them.
For instance, if you know your boyfriend needs alone time to recharge their energy, then that’s what you should provide them. Providing your partner’s needs, even if it may not make sense in the moment, is the perfect way to get them to appreciate you more and even fall in love with you deeper.
In a relationship, you can only hope to be able to provide each other’s needs, and that’s how you gain love an affection from them in the most effective manner. Furthermore, it makes them feel like you understand them and you’re not resenting them from having those specific needs.
Should You Listen to Them?
In order to get love and affection from your boyfriend, you need to actually listen to them- and they need to feel listened to. The problem with communication in relationships nowadays is that people listen to response, and not to hear what your partner is saying.
If you want love and affection from your partner, they need to feel like they’re being heard. When they open up about a certain issue, they should feel like their feelings and thoughts are being validated and heard.
After all, a relationship is as intimate as how you’re able to open up about your feelings. Ask them how they’re feeling from time to time and if they’re not okay, let them know that your relationship is a safe space to share your emotions and thoughts into.
Even the things you don’t understand such as when they share their passion for games or certain hobbies, lend an ear out and listen to them in these times.
Can You Be Be Patient and Understanding?
If anything, relationships test the amount of patience and understanding you have for your significant other. If you want love and affection from your partner, always choose to understand them, even when you don’t understand where they’re coming from.
In arguments or conflicts, don’t talk to them when you’re overwhelmed with emotions yourself or don’t nag them. If there’s anything a boyfriend hates, it’s a nagging girlfriend. Instead, talk to them with patience and love, so they feel that they’re in a safe space, even in conflict.
You’re supposed to be on the same team, even when you don’t necessarily agree with one another. If you want love and affection from your boyfriend, remember to give them patience and understanding as well. When you see them angry or frustrated, be patient with them and just be there for them.
As their girlfriend, you act as his peace and comfort. This is why ultimately, patience and understanding is the best thing you can do to gain their love and affection.
Can You Give Them Your Undivided Attention?
Just because you spend all of your time with them, it doesn’t mean they feel loved and appreciated in return. Sometimes, you could spend your entire day with them and be focused on something else entirely. You may not realize it, but focus has everything to do with showing people love and affection as well.
When you spend your day with your boyfriend, put down your phone and avoid unnecessary distractions. People want to feel important and like your attention is on them, so don’t be preoccupied with something else when you’re with your boyfriend.
A lot of people resent their partners when they’re constantly distracted even on dates so if you truly want the love and attention of your boyfriend, you need to put your focus on him as well. When you’re with him, put all your undivided attention on him so that he’ll give you the same love and attention back.
Should You Always Hug Him?
Hugs and other forms of physical affection are the easiest ways to show your boyfriend how much you love him and how much he means to you. Hugs are also a great way to develop intimacy with someone, and by hugging your boyfriend, you make him feel loved and safe.
The thing about wanting love and affection from your boyfriend is that it has to come naturally, and you have to give love first before expecting it from them. As mentioned above, nobody wants a one-sided type of love and before wanting love and affection, you must first give it out.
At the end of the day, if your boyfriend loves you, he’ll naturally show you love and affection. It may not come naturally to him, but you have to look at the little things, too. People don’t always go around saying ‘I love you’ but they do show it in the simplest and most mundane actions, such as making you coffee or spending time with you.
Actions still speak louder than words, and it’s most important to know this. In your relationship, it’s important to see the little things for what they are. Love in itself is the most selfless and unconditional act of all, and it’s all about making the other person happy without expecting anything in return. This concept is what usually makes love both simple and complicated on its own.
Love is simple, but people make relationships complicated than what it’s supposed to be- when it isn’t supposed to be that way. In relationships, it’s about what you can do for the other person, rather than what you can get back.
To get love and affection from your boyfriend, you need to understand that it has to be natural. It’s all we can hope for in relationships. You wouldn’t get into a relationship with someone that doesn’t feel the same way about you, otherwise, it isn’t real.
People show love in different manners and you just have to carefully look at the signs. It may not always be evident, but it’s there. Most often than not, he loves you and he’s showing you love and affection- just not in the way that you expect to. People have different love languages, which is why early on in a relationship, you need to express these love languages so people can love you right.